Monday, November 21, 2011

The Petition Edition

Sign on the dotted line.It's Thanksgiving week in Lake County -- traditionally a time to pause & reflect and make sure your petition packets are bound, correctly numbered and in sequential order. Ha ha, it's the last Monday before the first filing day and operatives are running around like turkeys with their heads chopped off hoping to secure enough signatures to meet their minimum ballot requirement.

Now that the county's been redistricted, virtually every office holder is up for re-election in 2012 -- from your congressman at the top of the ballot all the way down to the lowly precinct captain at the bottom, and with a bunch of state legislators & county board reps packed in between. That crowd of last minute shoppers at your grocery store are actually petition circulators -- so do like your LakeCountyEye and memorize this helpful phrase ...
Ich weiß nicht Englisch!
and purchase that sixpack of holiday cheer with no unwanted delay!

According to the LakeCountyEye rule of thumb, if you are reading this but still don't have your minimum required signatures then please go home, you're not a real candidate. (For the record, a real candidate in your situation would file a short petition stack and hope no one challenges.) Nothing screams political loser noob louder than the candidate who files X plus 2 signatures for an office requiring X signatures. Seriously, if you can't file a challenge-proof X times 2 signatures, then just file a sheet or two from that last Chamber and/or Union meeting. At least it will look like you got something or other up your sleeve.

Regardless what anyone says, operatives this week can be expected to -- erm -- forge ahead to meet their petition goals. Of course your LakeCountyEye doesn't need to convene a roundtable ring of experts to make it known that forgery is illegal. However your LakeCountyEye is reminded of one enterprising operative who, back in the day, produced a thick stack of petitions with names copied out of a Minneapolis phone book. A skeptical collaborator reminded him that they were filing in Lake County. "Right," said the operative. "These are all people from Minnesota. Who's going to suspect that any of these names were forged?"

Look for your LakeCountyEye outside a grocery store near you.

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